


Got Some Things I Want to Say

by perseajackson



Category: Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: F/M, Other, TCW, The Clone Wars - Freeform, this takes place abooouuut six months before ROTS..!
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-16
Updated: 2020-08-16
Packaged: 2021-03-06 06:15:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,177
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25938757
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/perseajackson/pseuds/perseajackson
Summary: Exii Zfkii isn't the commander for the 303rd, but she's done enough missions with them that she considers them her men all the same. When a massacre occurs on the Mid Rim moon of Maaton that takes out almost a quarter of the 303rd Battalion's troopers, she clings to desperate hope that one of the three survivors is Sergeant Roswell, the one clone she's grown...closestto in these long years of war.---This is a sort of prologue for a series of blips and short stories mostly following my clone oc Roswell as he finds a new life outside of the GAR. This will likely be a standalone work within a collection that will have a longer, chaptered work following Roswell. If I add to this, it'll be things from Exii's perspective!More info in the a/n!
Relationships: Clone Troopers & Original Female Character(s), Original Clone Trooper Character(s) & Original Character(s), Original Clone Trooper Character(s)/Original Jedi Character(s)
Kudos: 1
Collections: Mar'eyi Narser





	Got Some Things I Want to Say

**Author's Note:**

> quick disclaimer: clone Lieutenant Keller and Jedi Knight Vren Huttara both belong to @melxncholly !!! go read her stuff i love her, mwah
> 
> also, Exii Zfkii's name is pronounced ex-EE zuh-FAH-kee

"Exii, I really don't-"

Something felt off in the Force. She couldn't quite place it. But something was  _ wrong. _

She opened the doors and hurried inside, gaining six sets of surprised eyes trained on her at once. The six clones were settled around two medic benches. The Kaminoan scientist was nearby paying no attention as she worked.

Keller, Pyrite, and Rift all looked extremely worse for wear. It had been almost a month since the massacre of the 303rd's forces on the moon of Maaton, almost a month since such a disturbance shook her out of her bacta-tank-induced coma. Her master had insisted she needed more time to heal, and he was likely right. Still, there was too much to be done. Exii wasn't allowed to travel to Maaton to look for survivors, as Javi had told her bitterly. He clearly wasn't pleased with the decision either, but apparently the Republic ship in orbit had done a scan and found no surviving life forms.

And it had been  _ wrong _

"General Zfkii," Fissure said with surprise. "I- I didn't realize you- I'm not sure if-"

"Exii, please," Javi wheezed behind her, putting a hand on her shoulder as he tried to catch his breath. 

Exii didn't hear either of them. She was counting the clones in her head over and over.  _ Keller, Pyrite, Rift. Keller, Pyrite, Rift. Keller, Pyrite, Rift… _

"Wh- Are you three… the only survivors..?" she asked slowly, dragging her eyes lastly to meet Keller's. 

The Lieutenant was sitting on one of the beds being prepped for immersion in a bacta tank. He looked like he'd been blown to hell and back, but the bitterness and anger on his face and the  _ fury _ and  _ betrayal  _ she sensed in him made her feel that no amount of bacta could heal this man.

"We are, sir," Pyrite said hesitantly. He and Rift looked mostly exhausted, although they shared a look of unease between the two of them.

"Roswell's gone, Commander," Keller said in a sharp, broken tone. He looked at her then, and she could feel his grief and anger and frustration and wariness and the  _ betrayal _ that she didn't understand. 

But his words froze her in place nonetheless. "He's… gone..," she said slowly.

Pyrite and Rift looked at Keller and then to the ground. "He didn't make it out," Rift said lowly. The medic sighed and rubbed his neck as he turned his face to the ground with tightly shut eyes.

_ "Once you're patched up, I think we should talk for a little while. It killed me to leave you in that temple. Got some things I want to say. Oh, by the way, you were right about what you said outside the camp on Tu-Mun. _

_ I know what's important. Feel better soon, X. -Ros." _

Exii slowly nodded, Rift and Keller's words running laps in her mind. She could hear Roswell's voice narrating his note left for her when she'd finished recovery. It was beginning to be louder than the sounds surrounding her physically. So she nodded again and walked over to the men and gave a small, sad smile.

"I am elated the three of you survived. Your lives are worth more than you know, and not just for the war. The Force is only strengthened by your survival, and I am grateful to see you," she said quietly, looking at each of them individually and meaning every single word of it. Her desire for Roswell did not impact her genuine relief at his brothers' survival. She took one of Rifts and Pyrite's hands in hers and kissed each of them gently on the cheek. They looked at her, a little stunned, but she just nodded and slowly released their hands.

Keller's emotions were so strong, she could feel him fighting himself to keep from drowning in them. She caught his eyes, despite his attempts to not look directly at her, and Exii placed her hands gently on either side of his face. "Find peace, Keller," she said softly and to only him. "We… both must find peace…" She kissed his forehead, a sign of respect and closeness he likely didn't fully understand.

"Commander..," Keller began to say, but she shook her head and used her thumb to brush away a stray tear on his cheek.

"You need your rest, Keller," she said with a soft sigh, and she quietly smoothed back his erratic hair. Exii gave him one more little smile before pulling back and thanking the clones again and exiting silently with Javi.

"Ex, I don't-" Javi started, but Exii just took his hand and, with a purposeful pace, led him down the halls and toward her quarters. Javi, thankfully, didn't try to speak.

Once they were safely shut into her room, the exhaustion and emotions of two months worth of failure, tragedy, and stress caused her to nearly collapse. She sat on the floor in Javi's arms and simply allowed herself to cry. She had lost her people. She had lost Roswell. She had gained Knighthood, but at a cost she had never wanted to pay.

_ Got some things I want to say. I know what's important. Feel better soon. _

She did not think she would feel better for a very long time.

\---

Exii sat on the floor of her Master's private room. She generally didn't like to come in here without his permission, but she didn't want to wait outside for him to return. Not when she kept losing her resolve and falling to shudders and tears every few minutes.

_ Roswell is gone. _

_ Got some things I want to say _ .

There were so many things  _ she  _ wanted to say. So many things she should have said. So many times she should have taken the opportunities presented to her and just…

A tear dripped down onto her arm and she sighed and furiously scrubbed her cheek again. She took a shaky breath and choked on it, whimpering as she pressed the heels of her hands against her eyes.

_ Control yourself. Control your emotions, _ she scolded herself. 

She took a deep breath, and another and another until her shoulders slowed their trembling and she slowly placed her hands back in her lap. With eyes closed and her back straight, she reached out into the Force, using her connection through the living Force as her guide as she searched… She wanted  _ proof _ he was gone.

Keller had said it himself, and she should have believed him. But her heart couldn't accept it. It refused to allow for closure. So she searched.

Helplessness was tingling in the back of her head as she heard the door open, and Vren's voice, concerned and surprised, spoke her name. And she dipped her head down, losing her concentration again as she felt the tears return. A moment later found her enveloped in Vren's arms, but she couldn't get her arms to hug him back. She just pressed her face into his shoulder and let her composure fall as he murmured words she couldn't bring herself to pay attention to.

**Author's Note:**

> a few notes just for fun!
> 
> -Exii is Bpfasshi, and because there isn't really any canon/legends lore for them, i've gone hog wild and created an entire culture and stuff for them, including things about names and words and how they utilize certain vowels, which is why her last name feels like it needs a few more letters LMAO
> 
> -The 303rd Battalion is a battalion i totally made up! specifically for my clone ocs!! Roswell is a sergeant for one of its squads, Whiskey Squad. All of his brothers, commanding officers, and the Jedi General and Commander are all my ocs [save for Clone Lieutenant Keller who is featured in this fic and belongs to @melxncholly here on ao3!!] they're a smaller battalion, around 400-500 men, and they specialize in support and reconnaissance. their commander is Jedi Padawan Javi, who is in this lil fic blip, who is also Exii's bff 
> 
> -Exii has a special connection to the living force, which causes her to become incapacitated very easily by disturbances in the force and when life is taken (meaning it is very hard for her to be on the front lines of a war where there's! yknow! lots of death!) so she did a lot of missions with the 303rd because many of their recon missions kept her away from the front lines yet still allowing her to be helpful and progressive for the war effort. this led to her becoming close with a lot of the clones in the 303rd, and Roswell happened to be one she became, ahem, Very Close To..! :flushed:
> 
> feel free to ask stuff or chat about my and your ocs in the comments!!!


End file.
